


If You Touched Me, Would You Feel My Guilt?

by Riddance



Category: The Flash
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-09
Updated: 2015-03-09
Packaged: 2018-03-16 22:30:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 363
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3505148
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Riddance/pseuds/Riddance
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This isn't cheating. But it's something.</p>
            </blockquote>





	If You Touched Me, Would You Feel My Guilt?

Iris hasn’t done anything wrong. Not really. 

Nothing to tell Eddie. Nothing she could tell him anyway.

First, he wouldn’t understand and then he’d probably freak out.

She’d freak out too if Eddie was having nightly conversations with some kind of superhero.

But even then it’s not the same. Is it?

No. It can’t be.

Because they both know the Flash exists so it’s not like he’s really a stranger.

He’s just someone they don’t know very well. Or, at least, Eddie doesn’t know very well.

And Iris doesn’t know him very well but she does, in a way.

He seems so familiar. Like they’ve met before. Like maybe he’s been there all along, secretly. And she’s bumped into him without knowing.

He’s blurry like that. Not just when he moves at superspeed, but blurry like there’s someone she’s forgotten about. Someone she met long ago now only in memories that are impossible to retrieve. No matter how hard she concentrates, they never come into focus.

When he zooms away, her mouth can’t help but fall open and her stomach lurches with excitement.

When he enters Jitters, she can sense a buzz of electricity in the air even before hearing or seeing him. 

When he’s standing a foot behind her, it’s like she can feel his chin resting on her shoulder. 

Sometimes she dreams of that.

Sometimes she dreams of his arms wrapping around her stomach and his cheek against her ear.

But only because he’s comforting.

She swears.

Only because she trusts him and he’s helped her and he’s done good for the city.

But then she can’t fall asleep because guilt sits in her stomach and her skin itches from imaginary tiny bugs.

‘Imagining isn’t the same as doing,’ she thinks firmly to herself, shrugging off Eddie when he tries to hold her closer because it makes the guilt harder to deal with, him not knowing he's touching a new person now. 

A person that apologizes to him, in her head, after every thought. A person who would trade sleeping in bed with him with talking to someone else on a rooftop.

But still she hasn't done anything wrong. Not really.


End file.
